Ecstasy reveals the true selfLet me tell you what Ecstasy has done for friends and me.
I take ecstasy about every six months. For me, that's the real bare minimum for
a complete growing experience. Six months assure that you have progressed
psychologically and emotionally if you're in a path of growth. I find that I
can integrate the experiences and teachings perfectly to my daily life; to
walking in the street with a friend, to listening to music, to loneliness in my
room, to meditation, and to hugging my mother and father. LSD is really
increidible, but its lessons can be pretty obscure. LSD is like a loving strict
father. Ecstasy, however, is like a loving mother who gives It to you. Whether
you can recognize It in both cases is up to you, and I find spacing the doses
up is one of the best ways there are when this is concerned.
I do love ecstasy as a "dance drug". When I read what you wrote about the monk
finding "dancing on ecstasy" and "meditating on ecstasy" as very distinct
experiences, I knew exactly what he meant. I find it irreverent, though, to
take the drug and thinking it was "the pill" who did that to you, and then
doing it every weekend. Whenever someone asks me about E, I always like to get
friends to understand it's actually not the pill... It is irreverence, to
YOURSELF, to think otherwise. How else can you realize this for sure, but [here
I go again] spacing the doses in time.
The first time we did ecstasy, it was an increidible experience, but I did not
understand the possibilities. The second time around, with my best friend in
the woods, it was the most amazing thing I have done in my life. Being able to
sit at the table with your known problems, and other unknown ones coming up, as
relaxed and objective as could be is what psychotherapy was supposed to be
about. I realized my self-esteem was actually not that high at the time, and
how some specific childhood problems were not completely solved. Better yet
than therapy, E is what life should be like, albeit a little less dense, but
just like that. My friend and I are intellectually-driven selves, though not
confined anymore to that way of looking at life. We are very proud of our
intelligence, though not arrogant about it. And she told me, after the
experience, that if she found out that ecstasy could take away 5% of her
intelligence, she could live with that. I, of course, know that is not
possible, being an information junkie. But, tell me, what is intelligence but a
tool, and being and staying in balance but THE GOAL?
Overall, the E experience has made me a more serene person. Everything feels
like "things work." I feel reassured that this place is pretty well organized.
It makes the spiritual teachings that the material world is fantasy very
tangible. I understand now how involvement with the things of the world should
not proceed as far as to make you lose your well-being and tranquility. My
spiritual teacher once said, "you should trade NOTHING for your internal
peace." And that notion is very present within my actions. I now do not know
how much E has done and how much I have done myself, but I can assure you that
E has played a part. I am now in the process of being able to rest while I act,
and not surrender to agitation because of activity, as well as stopping the
internal dialogue for more prolonged periods. You asked for a survey on
"spiritual" experiences on substances, and I can tell you that, in a way, my
life is one.
People take ecstasy and their Selves are revealed. People take LSD and part of
the universe is unveiled. Millions of people. And there are still wars and
disinformation; we still supress women and indigenous people; millions of
lives, energy and money are spent on the "war on some drugs". My friends, this
is enough. The answer to the problems of the world is NOT in drugs. The problem
is NOT the world, and the answer is in Yourselves. That has been said a million
times by all religions, though mysteriously not noticed by most western
philosophers (Erich Fromm being an exception). You can, and should, make the
world a better place, but be sure to MAKE YOUR CONSCIOUSNESS A BETTER PLACE
FIRST. Ecstasy is but a tool for that.
Why is ecstasy not an answer, but only possible further questions? I remember I
was very impressed, though not surprised, when a friend returned from a trip to
Spain and told me what follows. While on E, he and his best friend shared
dancing at a rave. Around my circle, we are very used to understanding that E
makes you wander inward. But when my friend started talking about personal
stuff to his buddy, he just told him "EVADE ALL THAT. JUST HAVE A GOOD TIME".
So, what is the moral of the story? E is, like the LaTour song says,
"everything and nothing at the same time". If you're not going to work, the
pill won't work for you. That way at least. Everybody's free to use tools any
way they want, but I do find it wasteful.
On another front, I ask everybody to understand that for E, when it's gone,
it's gone. Don't do more than a pill, or 1.5 pills at a time. That's asking for
trouble. And, when experimenting with any substance, first reach out for
information. Uncensored chunks of it are available on the Internet for you to
read through by the tons. Do it, and keep them uncensored. Back up the people
who do research and those who make it available.
From a 22-year old engineering student in Mexico City
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