Terrified first time user

I used E for the first time last weekend at a rave in Montreal. I had
heard stories about how the E in Canada was actually bad heroin and my
friends here in Kingston, Ontario warned me not to take it. But, I
figured even if it was heroin, It would be good. And it was. The thing
is, I had had a few shots (of alcohol)a few hours before along with a
couple of joints and within an hour of taking the E, I smoked a joint
laced with coke. I had the most intense, orgasmic experience of my life
and feel like I've been changed inside (like psyche-wise)forever as a
result. Whem I went home however, I realized that I was seeing
everything in pink and my friends features were distorted. Does Eing
involve hallucinating as well? The same friend read me some little
pamphlet on E in which it said that it was a combination of acid and
speed. That freaked me out and so I started calling hospitals because I
think I was coming down at that point and I really thought my heart was
going to explode and I was trembling violently and i had the most
sickeninf fog of paranoia envelop my mind. The hospitals gave me the
runaround for an entire hour, referring me to other #,telling me to
check in, scoldinme and basically not giving me an answer to my Q:when
would I come down and was I gonna die?

Now that i'm more informed, i realize that i should not have taken an
entire pill on my first trip and certainly shouldn't have done that
little insane cocktail. I realize that you are probably a very busy
person, seeing as you seem to be the only authority on E, but if you
could answer a few of my questions, I'd greatly appreciate it; what do
you think it was that was in my pill that night (it had a bitter
taste)?will my next trip be less scary now that my body knows E? As a
healthy person, could it have had any lasting negative effect on my
spine, brain or heart? I don't plan to E for another month and even then
i only plan to do half a pill. But, at the rave/club scene in Montreal
the pills that are mainly circulating are called strawberries because
they're pink and they taste like strawbrries and they allegedly contain
speed. Do you know anything about them? Because I don't even though I've
taken them pretty often(as in, what do they contain). Wow, that's a lot
of questions but I just want to be informed; I'm a first year premed
student and I don't want to fuck up my life; I want to trip the safe
way. That's why i'm sticking to shrooms and speed for the rave THIS
weekend. I better sign off but before I do I'd like to thank you fron
the bottom of my heart and smother you with electronic kisses for being
there for the raving community. I realize that you probably won't have
time to answer this email but I'll thank you for reading it!

Reply

First, Ecstasy should be MDMA which is not a mixture of anything else. Secondly, the pills tested have often contained other things but never anything more harmful than pure MDMA or amphetamine. They all taste bitter. Heroin has never been found; more information on my site.

So relax about the possibility of having damaged yourself physically, although alcohol, E, and amphetamine/coke all put a strain on the liver and specially so in combination.

I think your reaction was psychological and you had a mild panic attack. There is more on my site about this. There is lots on the research too on my site and in my books.

As far as whether you will have a good time in the future, the thing to remember is that E is not a happy pill. It allows you to let go and have a wonderful time in the right situation, but letting go can also allows suppressed worries etc to surface; even things you may not admit to yourself.

So, my advice is not to take anything else with the E; if you are not sure of the quality, take half your usual amount first and wait until you feel the effect before taking the rest; only take it when you are already feeling good, in a situation where you feel good and with people who you feel good with. And make it something to save for special occasions, because the best effects are not repeated if you take a lot regularly. Instead, remember the E state and try to bring it into the rest of your life.

[I sent this reply but it was returned as the return address must have been wrong. Hope you find it here - NS]